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افزایش اعتماد به نفس و عوامل موثر بر آن
اعتماد به نفس یکی از مهمترین پیش نیازهای رسیدن به موفقیت، شادی و لازمه یک زندگی خوب است. داشتن اعتماد به نفس به محیط پیرامون، افرادی که با آنها در ارتباط هستیم و تجربیاتی که از گذشته داشتهایم، ارتباط مستقیم دارد. با وجود اعتماد به نفس شما میتوانید در مواجه با هر مسئلهای محکم و قوی برخورد کنید و برای خودتان و تلاشتان احترام قائل باشید.
اگر تا به امروز دچار احساس خجالتزدگی شدهاید، در مقابل کاری که مطابق میلتان نبوده است، نتوانستهاید نه بگویید و شروع هر حرکتی برایتان سخت بوده است، شما دچار کمبود اعتماد به نفس هستید. در این مقاله قرار است راجع به اعتماد نفس و تاثیرات منفی و مثبت و راههای افزایش اعتماد به نفس آن صحبت کنیم.
اعتماد به نفس چیست؟
به نگرش مثبتی که شما به خودتان، مهارتها و تواناییهایتان دارید، اعتماد به نفس گفته میشود. یعنی شما خودتان عقاید و مهارتهایتان را قبول دارید و احساس میکنید کنترل زندگی در دستانتان است.
"باربارا دی آنجلیس" مشاور و سخنران و نویسنده در زمینه رشد شخصی است. اعتماد به نفس را به این صورت معنا میکند: باور به توانایی و قابلیت انسانی خویش با رغم ترسهایی که برای شما وجود دارد. اینکه با هر آنچه در زندگی پیش آید. روبرو میشوید، از عهده آنها بر میآیید و آنچه را که ضروری است انجام میدهید.
وجود اعتماد به نفس کمک میکند، شما نقاط قوت و ضعف خود را به خوبی بشناسید. کمک میکند دیدگاه مثبتی نسبت به خود داشته باشید. انتظارات و اهداف واقع بینانه از خودتان خواهید داشت. به راحتی میتوانید در برابر کاری که نمیخواهید، بگویید خیر! همچنین در ارتباطهای خود قاطع برخورد خواهید کرد.
بالعکس کمبود اعتماد به نفس باعث میشود، شما در کارهای خود احساس تردید داشته باشید. منفعل یا مطیع باشید و در اعتماد به دیگران نیز مشکل داشته باشید.
عوامل موثر بر داشتن اعتماد به نفس
احساس اعتماد به نفس ممکن است به موقعیتی که شما در آن قرار دارید نیز بستگی داشته باشد. به عنوان مثال: شما میتوانید در زمینه شغلی خودتان فردی با اعتماد به نفس باشید، اما در روابط شخصیتان اعتماد به نفس نداشته باشید.
اعتماد به نفس بیشتر از اینکه به مهارتهای شما بستگی داشته باشد، به تصوری که شما نسبت به خودتان دارید بر میگردد. شاید شما در زمینه کار با کامپیوتر انقدر مهارت داشته باشید که بتوانید به عنوان استاد تدریس کنید. اما تصوری که از خودتان دارید، این باشد که شما آنقدرها که باید از کامپیوتر نمیدانید و از آنجایی که اعتماد به نفس از تصور شما تاثیر میگیرد، پس اعتماد به نفستان کاهش پیدا خواهد کرد.
بزرگ شدن در محیطی که فرد بدون پشتوانه است. قضاوتهای بیش از حد سخت، توجه نکردن به مهارتها، تنبیه شدن به خاطر اشتباهات و تجربیات مختلف دیگر میتواند به از بین بردن اعتماد به نفس و یا افزایش اعتماد به نفس کمک کند.
اهمیت اعتماد به نفس
داشتن اعتماد به نفس روی سلامت روح و جسم شما بسیار تاثیر گذار است. طبق مطالعات انجام شده افرادی که دارای اعتماد به نفس هستند، عمر طولانیتری دارند و همچنین سالمتر هستند. به دلیل اینکه اعتماد به نفس باعث شادی، خوشبینی و رضایت فرد از خودش میشود. اگر اعتماد به نفس لازم را به دست بیاورید. رسیدن به تناسب اندام برای شما خیلی راحتتر از چالش رویارویی با آن است.
افراد دارای اعتماد به نفس از انجام کارهایی که نمیخواهند، بیشتر در امان هستند، زیرا تحت فشار دیگران قرار نمیگیرند و به راحتی نه خواهند گفت. بسیاری از مردم که دچار کمبود اعتماد به نفس هستد. میتوانند به راحتی تصمیم بگیرند، زیرا آنها به خود اطمینان ندارند و دچار شک خواهند شد.همچنین اگر کارها مطابق برنامه پیش نرود، به جای پیدا کردن راه حل دوم به دنبال انتقاد خود هستند.
اعتماد به نفس در روابط بین فردی شما بسیار تاثیر خواهد گذاشت. زمانی که شما خودتان را دوست داشته باشید و به خودتان احترام بگذارید، افراد نیز به شما احترام خواهند گذاشت. از آنجایی که از لحاظ احساسی مستقل هستید، دچار وابستگی بیش از حد نمیشوید. میتوانید تصمیمات بهتری بگیرید و اعتماد به نفس باعث صداقت بیشتر کلمات خواهد شد.
همچنین اعتماد به نفس بر تمامی احساسات شما از جمله شادی تاثیر خواهد داشت.
دکتر علی شاه حسینی در وبینار افزایش اعتماد به نفس در ارتباط با اهمیت اعتماد به نفس کامل توضیح دادهاند و همچنین کمک میکنند که شما نیز یکی از افراد با اعتماد به نفسی که ویژگی آنها را در ادامه خواهیم خواند باشید.
ویژگی افراد دارای اعتماد به نفس
زمانی که شما فردی دارای اعتماد به نفس هستید، از پرسیدن و اعلام آن چه که نیاز دارید، نمیترسید. به راحتی و به صورت مستقیم درخواست خود را بیان خواهید کرد. افراد با اعتماد به نفس به دلیل جرئتی که دارند، به راحتی اولین قدم را برای رسیدن به ایده هایشان بر میدارند. تسلیم مشکلات و قضاوتهای مردم نمیشوند.
افراد دارای اعتماد به نفس از آنجایی که به خود اطمینان دارند، میتوانند مسیر زندگی خود را راحتتر انتخاب کنند. آنها به دنبال رشد و پیشرفت هستند. به اهداف خود متعهد هستد و تحت هر شرایطی آن را انجام میدهند.
یکی از راههایی که به دست آوردن خواسته شما رو تضمین میکند، توانایی پرسیدن و درخواست کردن است. به عبارتی اگر نپرسید به دست نمیآورید. زیرا قرار نیست شما به تمامی موارد مسلط و بلد باشید و گاها میتوانید از افرادی که تجربه بیشتری از شما دارند، درخواست کمک کنید.
تصور کنید فردی بعد از تحصیل در دبیرستان درس خود را در دانشگاه ادامه نداده است و در مصاحبههای خود به علت نداشتن مدرک دانشگاه دچار مشکل شده است. اما از آنجایی که از نمره مناسب نگرفتن و قضاوت شدن، میترسد. حاضر به اقدام برای ثبت نام در دانشگاه نیست. در صورتی که فرد دارای اعتماد به نفس در شرایط مشابه بیاهمیت به قضاوت افراد در دانشگاه ثبت نام کرده و بعد از 4 سال مدرک خود را دریافت میکند.
هرچه اعتماد به نفس بیشتری داشته باشید، میتوانید صدای درون خود را که می گوید: "من نمی توانم این کار را انجام دهم." بیشتر آرام کنید. شما قادر خواهید بود از افکار منفی خود خارج شوید و در راستای ارزشهای خود اقدام کنید. کمبود اعتماد به نفس باعث نوشخوار فکری و یا تمایل به بررسی مکرر نگرانیها و اشتباهات خواهد شد.
5 نشانه اعتماد به نفس پایین و عدم اعتماد به نفس
1. عزت نفس ضعیف
عزت نفس کاملا با اعتماد به نفس متفاوت است. کلمه عزت نفس یعنی من فردی ارزشمند هستم و صلاحیت یک زندگی موفق، خوب و دریافت عشق را دارم. لزوما فردی که در کاری اعتماد به نفس بالایی دارد. به معنای داشتن عزت نفس بالا نیست. اما اگر شما عزت نفس ضعیفی داشته باشید، باعث میشود. اعتماد به نفستان نیز کاهش پیدا کند.
2. عدم کنترل زندگی
افرادی که اعتماد به نفس پایینی دارند، اغلب احساس میکنند که کنترل چندانی بر زندگی خود یا آنچه برای آنها اتفاق میافتد ندارند. این ممکن است به این دلیل باشد که آنها احساس میکنند، توانایی کمی در ایجاد تغییرات در خود یا در جهان دارند. از آنجایی که آنها تحت فشار منابع خارجی مانند محیط پیرامون و اطرافیان هستند، ممکن است احساس کنند که قادر به انجام هر کاری برای رفع مشکلات خود نیستند.
3. مقایسه منفی با افراد دیگر
خود را دائما با دیگران و جمعی که در آن قرار دارند، مقایسه میکنند. مقایسه اجتماعی گاهی اوقات میتواند عملکرد مثبتی داشته باشد و حس مثبت و رقابت در فرد تقویت کند. با این حال، مقایسه خود با دیگران نیز می تواند در آسیب رساندن به اعتماد به نفس نقش پررنگی داشته باشد. افرادی که اعتماد به نفس پایینی دارند، بیشتر از افراد دیگر خود را مقایسه میکنند، آنها دائما در حال مقایسه خود با افرادی هستند که در ظاهر از خودشان بهتر هستند.
رسانه های اجتماعی نیز ممکن است در این گونه مقایسه ها نقش داشته باشند. اگر غالباً خود را با افراد مطرح در شبکه های اجتماعی مانند فیس بوک و اینستاگرام مقایسه کنید، در کاهش اعتماد به نفس شما تاثیر خواهد گذاشت.
4. عدم درخواست موارد موردنیازتان
وقتی فردی از اعتماد نفس پایینی برخوردار است، برای درخواست آنچه نیاز دارد، دچار مشکل میشود. از آنجا که عزت نفس آنها پایین است، ممکن است احساس کنند که سزاوار کمک نیستند. آنها همچنین ممکن است از نیاز به کمک و حمایت احساس خجالت یا بی کفایتی کنند.
5. نگرانی و شک به خود
افراد دارای کمبود اعتماد به نفس حتی پس از تصمیم گیری، نگران هستند که انتخاب اشتباهی کردهاند. آنها به نظرات خود شک دارند و اغلب ممکن است به جای پایبندی به انتخابهای خود، به آنچه دیگران فکر میکنند، راضی شوند.
نگرانی و شک نسبت به خود باعث میشود این افراد دچار حدس و گمانهای زیادی نسبت به خود شوند و تصمیم گیری در مورد زندگی برای آنها دشوارتر است. اگر وبینار اعتماد به نفس دکتر شاهحسینی را دیده باشید. در این رابطه میگویند: یکی از بزرگترین بلاهای عدم اعتماد به نفس، تردید داشتن و دو دلیهای بیدلیل است.
5 راهکار برای افزایش اعتماد به نفس
1. هدف گذاری روزانه داشته باشید
احساس موفقیت بر اعتماد به نفس شما تاثیر زیادی خواهد داشت. اگر به اهداف کوچک و بزرگ خود برسید، احساس بسیار بهتری نسبت به خودتان خواهید داشت. شما میتوانید در ابتدا برای خودتان اهداف کوچک روزانه در نظر بگیرید. به طور مثال شما میخواهید آزمون آیلتس بدهید، هدف امروزتان این باشد که چند کلمه و یک گرامر یاد بگیرید.
اگر یک مدت هر روز به اهداف روزانه خود برسید، احساس بهتری نسبت به خودتان خواهید داشت. سپس اهداف هفتگی، ماهیانه و سالیانه برای خود شروع میکنید و به تمامی اهداف خود خواهید رسید. توجه داشته باشید پیشرفت و تغییرات بزرگ یک شبه اتفاق نخواهند افتاد، با تلاش و به صورت تدریجی به دست میآیند.
2. پیشرفت خود را زیر نظر بگیرید
بهترین راه برای رسیدن به اهداف خود، کوچک یا بزرگ، تقسیم آنها به اهداف کوچکتر و آگاهی بر میزان پیشرفت شما است. بهترین راه برای آگاهی از میزان پیشرفت شما نظارت بر آن است. سعی کنید دستاوردهای خود را ثبت کنید. برنامه ریزی خود، قدمهایی که برای اهداف خود برداشتهاید، اهداف بعدی و تمامی موارد را ثبت کرده و هر روز خودتان را با دیروز خودتان مقایسه کنید.
این به شما کمک میکند تا در مسیر خود باقی بمانید و با پیشرفتهایی که مشاهده میکنید، اعتماد به نفس خود را افزایش می دهید و در انتها برای پیشرفت خود جایزه در نظر بگیرید.
3. در چهارچوب زندگی خودتان عمل کنید
اکثر افراد دارای اعتماد به نفس بر اساس یک سیستم ارزشی مشخص شده زندگی میکنند و تصمیمات خود را بر اساس آن نظام ارزشی میگیرند. حتی زمانی که در شرایط سخت قرار دارند از چهارچوب خود خارج نخواهند شد.
از خودتان بپرسید دوست دارید شخصیت ایدهآل مورد نظر از خودتان چگونه باشد؟ بعد از اینکه این سوال را پاسخ دادید، درست مثل همان فرد زندگی کنید. درست است در ابتدا این کار شاید واقعا سخت باشد. اما بعد از مدتی به آن عادت کرده و از شخصیت جدید خود لذت خواهید برد.
4. ورزش کنید
ورزش علاوه بر اینکه به طور کلی برای سلامتی شما مفید است. به حفظ حافظه، بهبود تمرکز، مدیریت استرس و جلوگیری از افسردگی نیز کمک میکند. زمانیکه شما ورزش میکنید، انرژی اضافی برای مضطرب شدن و توجه به افکار سمی نخواهید داشت.
زمانی که شما ورزش میکنید، بدنی سالمتر و متناسبتر خواهید داشت. این مسئله به اعتماد به نفس شما کمک خواهد کرد. بنابراین حتما ورزش را در برنامه زندگی خود قرار دهید.
5. نترس باشید
شکست دشمن شما نیست، ترس از شکست است که واقعاً شما را فلج میکند. اگر اهداف بزرگی را برای خود تعیین کردهاید و رویاهای بزرگی دارید؛ ممکن است در ابتدا احساس غرق شدن در ناامیدی و افکار سمی داشته باشید. در ادامه احساس خواهید کرد که نمیتوانید این کار را انجام دهید. اما شما نباید تسلیم این افکار شوید، ذره ذره شهامت خود را جمع آوردی کرده و فقط به خودتان و راهتان فکر کنید و ادامه دهید.
تک تک افراد موفق و با اعتماد به نفس در ابتدا بسیار ترسیدهاند، اما با این وجود به راه خود ادامه داده و ریسک کردهاند. زیرا هدفی که برای رسیدن به آن تلاش میکنند، مهمتر و ضروریتر از ترس آنها از شکست است. به این فکر کنید که چقدر تمایل دارید به هدفتان برسید، ترس خود را کنار بگذارید و به مسیر رسیدن به موفقیت ادامه دهید.
نتیجه گیری
اعتماد به نفس یعنی شما به خودتان ایمان دارید که میتوانید در یک زمینه موفق باشید و از پس آن برآیید. به همین علت ممکن است، فقط در یک زمینه اعتماد به نفس شما بالا و در زمینههای دیگر اعتماد به نفس شما پایین باشد. داشتن اعتماد به نفس میتواند بر روی روابط، تحصیل و کسب و کار شما تاثیر بگذارد.
اگر شما فردی با اعتماد به نفس بالا باشید. با چشم انداز بهتری نسبت به تمامی زوایا تصمیم گیری خواهید کرد. حتی اگر نتیجه کار چیزی نباشد که شما میخواستید خیالتان راحت است که تمامی تلاش خود را کردهاید و نتیجه را میپذیرید.
لطفا به دوستانی که انتخاب میکنید، محیطی که در آن قرار میگیرید توجه کنید. عوامل زیادی از جمله افرادی که با آنها در ارتباط هستیم، بر روی داشتن اعتماد به نفس تاثیر خواهند داشت. به عنوان یک فرد دارای اعتماد به نفس خودتان را با هیچکس مقایسه نکنید و تمام تمرکزتان بر روی خودتان و موفقیتتان باشد.
اعتماد به نفس در یک شب به دست نمیآید و نیازمند تلاش و تمرین مکرر است. راهکارهای زیادی برای افزایش اعتماد به نفس وجود دارد که در این مقاله به 5 مورد از راهکارها برای افزایش اعتماد به نفس اشاره کردهایم.
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